friendships · relationships

Seriously we are JUST friends.

ded283fc5619043af3c50eeca8bd3ff5I am so bored of being the person who is made to feel guilty for being a friend with a boy. I am bored of feeling like I shouldn’t be friends with a boy, because their girlfriends become jealous or worried etc. I am in no way a relationship wrecker, never will I want to ruin a relationship between two people. If you know me, you will know this to be absolutely true, Β I love the idea of people in relationships, love seeing how happy they are and watching people fall in love. But I am just so sick of being push aside when I have done nothing wrong, when other people’s thoughts over control their emotions and actions.

It’s happened so many times in my life nowadays that I am either getting to the stage of becoming used to it, or I am getting angry.

Three examples:

1 – my closest best friend, known him for 10+ years now, but as soon as a relationship happens there goes me fading into the background. I ABSOLUTELY understand that the first few months are all like a honeymoon, and good for them for having a lovely time but… wiping me out 😐 nah. Maybe I am just too naive? I am all for meeting the girlfriends and becoming friends with them πŸ™‚

2 – another close friend that I have known about 8 years now *this one is DIFFERENT* we had a moment of liking each other, but I was seeing someone else and he moved on of course, which was good. From then on, he didnt reply to any of my texts, messages etc, I saw him once and the girlfriend wasn’t nice to me and honestly hand on heart, hand up in the air etc…. he did try to drunk kiss me, but I demanded that he went back to his girlfriend. I did not react in anyway, as I was in pure shock and just stood there. 1 year and a bit later, we decided to meet up and talked for about 1 week and after the meet up back in February this year, I have not heard from him since…

there is no way on this earth, I would ever do anything to break down a relationship. I just want my friend back.

3 – I was working with this guy and we talked a lot, (yet again, I had no romantic feelings for him, like eew no!) and er we were on a night out and it was the same night out my dad was put in intensive care. I was feeling absolutely shit, and he was one of the VERY few people I spoke to the situation about, he could see I was upset and gave me a hug. An innocent hug. But no the girlfriend saw this and dragged him away, a few weeks later he deleted me off facebook, he wasn’t allowed to talk to me, and even to the point he wasnt allowed LOOK AT ME!! I remember once, going down the same aisle at work, and he dipped his head and turned around. haha I seriously thought this is fucking ridiculous.

I am all for 2nd chances and he added me back on Facebook when he was out of his relationship for a good few months now, and I told him what I thought because I was angry and he even agreed with me. IE – on nights out she was drag him away, he wouldn’t look at me and others think she is a psycho too. Et voila, less than 48 hours later, he deleted me and back in a relationship with her

** 2 days ago, he added me back as he is single again, that was automatically ignored.

Now for a flip on my views

Point 1 person –Β I will always be friends with this person, we have been through a lot together and we have also agreed that if this does happen for much longer I am allowed to absolutely tell him off. I haven’t met his new girlfriend, but his ex was weary of me. Yet again, Β I am not interested in him. If they make himΒ sad, I will be on his side, but if he does something wrong, I will tell him straight.

Point 2 person – Me and his girlfriend have had a big discussion about this, she knows of our past which I can see why she is a bit on edge around me, and we have agreed that we will start again. Which is a view I put to her and she agreed, but this does not seem the case. There will always be something between me and him, don’t know why its just our thing as many people thought we would get together, but aaaaaaaaaaaaaaabsolutely I will never get in the way of a relationship with her or any other girl.

I will listen to him when he slags her off, but not pass judgement, I will listen when he wants to talk, because he is my friend. But the fact that he has apologised about not speaking to me, had nothing positive to say about her last time I spoke with him and saying that its her fault that hes not been able to speak to me, still makes me upset.

Point 3 person –Β I will talk to when I see you, but by god I will not be all happy to you as before. She will never like me for some strange reason, and she has never given me the opportunity to get to know her or even to say hello to her.


 

f4ae771a397275957532dcd98f6d2533I know that the quote above is often shared online, sometimes its true but often the case it isnt. But the ones that get hurt are the ones that are shoved aside. I am sick of jealous over controlling girlfriends. Surely these girls cannot be happy in relationships if they are constantly on edge? So fed up of feeling guilty for being a friend with a boy.

Argh so annnoyed!!!

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2 thoughts on “Seriously we are JUST friends.

  1. I grew up with two older brothers and have always found it easier to get on with boys than girls. I’ve always found girls bitchy and have endured my fair share of bullying from other girls. I know exactly what you mean when a guy gets a gf and they then change – they just need to grow some balls! You are so lovely and no one could ever accuse you of ‘home wrecking’ this notion is ridiculous. Much love XOXO

    Liked by 1 person

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