When I first moved into my flat back in March, I had so many emotions and I still do. I am still finding it hard to process, still trying to juggle financially (hopefully I am getting better) and I am trying to make it all okay for me.
At the start of the whole moving in and then into lockdown, I received a lovely letter from my auntie. I had hid it away until last week, as it caused me to cry a lot and I brought it out again this weekend as she came to visit. She was there when me and my mum were picking out curtains, choosing the rugs, the pillows etc so she has been on this journey with me.
I am surrounded by many strong women in my life and also in my past. Women to me are bloody strong willed in my family, and I thought I would share my letter from her to me, incase anyone else is feeling a bit bleurgh:
Just a quick note. Remember when I said you may have thoughts of “oh fuck what have I done?” well I am sure that you’re having them now and that’s totally normal.
You are expected to be excited but it’s sometimes scary doing things on your own, take it from me, I know.
However, you come from a long line of strong independent women, who have managed quite successfully to get along living on their own.
Me… (well I am trying to)
Both of your Nans, look how your Nan Davies coped after your Grandad passed away.
Your Great Grandmother.
Your Great Great Grandmother and these are all I know of, but I am sure that there are many more.
You’ll be fine, it takes guts to actually go out there and do what you’re doing so you have more confidence than you think, I was just landed with it!
Yes there will be bumps in the road, but in the words of Frank Sinatra:
“That’s life – each time I find myself laying flat on my face, I just pick myself up and get back in the race!” (woah old blue eyes songs are ingrained in me, thanks Mum!).
Take each day as it comes, enjoy yourself and have fun, and no regrets!
If you ever need me, I am always there for you at any time.
Lots of love from your favourite Auntie.
It just really empowers me this letter, she’s had a shit time (cheers fuckwit “uncle”) but she is one strong woman. Both my nans had to live alone for many years due to different reasons but they still powered through and they were such lively spirits.
So what I am trying to say is, you may feel low right now but please surround yourself with people who will have your back and some fucking powerful women.
Lots of love,