It all works out in the end

Hi you lovely lot, well lol i’ve been quite quiet on here haven’t I? Reason being, I haven’t had the need to be. My blog was there to put down those thoughts that have been negative mostly and lately I have been the complete opposite. Well, apart from the car accident, the plumbing problems, endless fillings falling out and slight mental breakdowns at work.

Anyway, how have you all been? I thought I’d pop in a post to let you know what’s been going on in my life.

As you can see from the title, “it all works out in the end” and it certainly does. I am finally not single anymore! Yes, me, the one that has been single for 10 years. I’ve found someone who makes me seriously happy, and I honestly didn’t have to look far at all… he is my best friend.

How did we meet?

Our story (if i don’t say so myself) is lovely. We first met at Safeway supermarket back when we were 16. We always worked the same shifts and got on so well. I fancied the pants off him and just adored him!! Little did i know (he told me in the past few months) that he also fancied me too! But neither of us did anything about it, everyone else could see it, and everyone else teased us that we should be together but we didn’t take that step.

When we turned 18 we had plenty of nights out together in a larger friendship group, again people thought we were together but… we were silly. He then got a girlfriend as I didnt show any interest (cheers love) and I took a step back. I didn’t want to feel heartbroken and I know that I was better to be in the position of friend.

A year later, they broke up and he rang me straight away saying how sad he was, and I just wanted to hug him. I was a couple of hours away at uni and I just couldn’t help him. Our friendship grew stronger and we would meet up for nights out at any occasion I was back in town. During university I was seeing someone (a right shitbag) and I left him to it, although we were still constantly in touch.

But surely there was a moment?

Whilst at university, I came back home to celebrate my birthday and in the morning before I left, it was around 8am and I got a knock at the door. It was him. He came to tell me that he had feelings for me and that he always had an always will. I was taken aback so much. I didnt expect it and I was seeing someone else at the time.

I felt awful and said that I was seeing someone. It was just so sad.

He moved on and got with a girl for roughly 4 to 5 years and I was kind of pushed aside as a friend. She was nice enough but I could see that they weren’t right for each other. On nights out we would be the same as we always were, and dance the night away.

However, again it wasn’t until the past few months that he told me of a certain night he wanted to kiss me. He was so sad that i had said no and he truly wasn’t in love with this girl, it was me.

We were like ships passing in the night. He was with someone, I was single. I was with someone he was single.

What happened next?

A few years later, we lost touch for about 6 months not that we didn’t’ speak it just wasn’t as prominent. During this time, he found a girl and quickly got engaged. I hadn’t met her before I was asked to come along to a surprise birthday event for him. I knew full well that she was inviting me to see who and what I am like, it wasn’t to support him, it was to eye me up.

She was nice, and my favourite of the girlfriends. But I had that huge disappointment and gut wrenching hut when the engagement was announced. I thought that’s it, I’ve lost him. I had that scene from Vicar of Dibley running through my head where she sings “it should have been me”.

Lockdown love

Around August 2021 we started to text everyday, it was like how it was years ago before the above girl came along. During that relationship, I didn’t really hear from him, i think he was told not to text. Anyway, I got him back. We were talking as friends and I found out that they had split up during the lockdown and this was the second split, in which they honestly couldn’t make it work.

I felt sad for him. He truly loved her, and as I have said previously I had put away my thoughts and feelings for him for years. I didn’t want that hope or heartbreak. I just wanted him in my life.

Roll on a few months and:

  • he bought me a birthday gift – which he had never done before
  • he sent me random fluffy socks because I am so cold in my flat at the weekend

During the start of February we were texting each other asking random questions and my question was “would you like to read people’s minds or travel?” and he said read people’s minds and then asked if I could travel back and time would I? I am a lover for the past and I said of course the past, in which he agreed. He then, went on to say that he has only one regret in life – to not keep asking me out. He also said that he has always liked me, and always fancied me. I was shocked!! I am so oblivious and I was texting my bestie like a teenager saying “LOOK WHAT HE IS SAYING!!!” Conversations went on and time passed into the end of February where…

  • he bought me a message in a bottle to remind me how beautiful I am
  • he sent me a valentines day card – my first ever
  • he bought me valentines day flowers

Our first date

I can tell you now that our first date we were both a nervous wreck. It was in the middle of the pandemic and we could only meet one on one. We ended up going to a local park, where he got all dressed up. He’s such an old romantic:

  • he holds the door open
  • buys me flowers
  • will not let me walk on the side of the road
  • made a picnic for us.

I knew instantly at the end of the date I wanted to be with him. I didn’t want to date anyone else. We had our first kiss in his car and it felt so easy. Our first kiss in our 16 years of friendship.

Our second date

Our second date was and is my fave. We went to a local town and just hung around, laughing and being silly. He seemed nervous for some reason and it wasn’t until it got dark that I knew why.

He was waiting to take to the highest peak in our county to see the stars at night. It was perfect.

The rest is history

As they say the rest is history. He is a gentleman and he wanted to ask me out for a third date, but even he confessed he wanted to be my boyfriend after the first date.

I love you is said so simply, so purely and it’s the best. I have never felt so loved, appreciated and admired so much. I still need to pinch myself.

Both our families have waited for this for so long. My best friends are just in awe.

I just love him.

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