Throughout my life I have had a few friends that are boys,I have been with them through thick and thin, through their big life events, girlfriends, proposals, ending of relationships and all the laughter. They make me laugh, make me feel safe, they don’t judge me and I know that if I feel down I can just talk to them…. but there is one issue that I’ve always had. The one issue that always makes our friendship go in and out, where I’m made to feel like the bad person or that I shouldn’t have friends that are boys, and that’s the dreaded jealous and insecure girlfriend.
Happy 2016 *still a stretch to the number 6* to you all and I hope that you are all cosied up in front of the telly, regretting how much food and alcohol you have consumed over the past few weeks. I hate to say it, but…… it’s Sunday and it’s the Sunday before the first full week back from the hols; in the words of Detox:
This now means that its that time of the year, when we start to look back on 2015 and to worry about what this year will bring. It only seems like a few weeks ago that it was January 2015, but time is flying by which is scary.
I haven’t really blogged in about a month and a half, I have been busy but also I havent really done anything before then to think… god this is blog worthy! And I have now just looked back at the past few weeks and thought hey up girl, you have done quite a bit to be fair!
At work, I wanted to celebrate positivity (and you know how much I love a bit of positivity), so for Valentines Day I thought hey nothing is going to be done about it, so how about the staff send lovely messages to each other, whether it be ‘I like you’, ‘you make me smile’, ‘thanks for your support’. It was hugely successful, to the point people wanted it every month. I had to count and categorise all the hearts into teams and it took me aaaages haha. I did feel bad for about 5/6 people who didn’t get any 😦 So you can see all the ones I received, yay go me! Continue reading “What I’ve been up to the past 2 months….”
I dont know whether it just in my life or its an age thing, but I have noticed more and more people are coming out of the woodwork as fake. I have a close set of friends who I know will all be there for each other. But I think over the past few months I have noticed it more and more.
It could be that I found out that a girl I used to get on really with at my old work, shockingly deleted me on facebook. I knew that she was very two faced at work, she would constantly bitch about someone at work and be nice as pie when they were infront of her. But it just kinda shocked me as every time I see her, she is sweet as pie to me and now its really making me think as to actually how two faced she was to me. I have definitely noticed it with a lot of my ex colleagues, they give the fakest smiles, I know they talk about me – I have never said a bad word about them since I have left.. maybe theyre jealous that I escaped that place. Here’s my negative comment haha – it’s full of people sleeping with each other at one point, they all gossip about each other, no support and there are so many families in there, you’re the outcast if you’re not a family member. That’s how it felt.
I do blame Facebook for this society of feeling like this, I technically shouldnt give two toots as to this action of “deletion”. But I would prefer if we had an argument lol and not just a cowardly way of “hey I dont want to be your friend anymore, im going to delete you”, Id prefer to have an actual reason.
I think it is an age thing, as I am becoming more and more comfortable in my own skin. I am not following others opinions, if someone does not like someone and they tell me to not like them, there’s no way in which I will do that. That person hasnt affected me in any way, so I will make up my own decisions. That’s how lies and chinese whispers go about.
This culture is becoming some sort of blame society, a fake and a lying society. If I like you, I like you – if I dont like you, i’ll just leave you to get on with your life and if believe in something I will fight for the cause.
I have posted previously about the positivity about girl power – check it out here —
Isnt it funny …. life, I think so. I think friendships and the closeness between friendship and possibilities between a male and a female is ridiculous. You either break the rule and actually be friends or you go with the trend that everyone thinks and get together finally. I have known 1 boy since we both started working together at the age of 16, I have known him this year for 9 years. We have been through each other’s ups and downs, relationships, single times, sicknesses etc but we’ve always been there for each other.
Many have thought over the years that I was either going to be with this boy or another. Both have asked me out. Let’s just clear that up now – oh and they used to be best of friends – awkward – different times………… now I am starting to sound a bit sleezy, I promise you it’s definitely not that LOL!
Anyway back on track, we meet up when we can but there’s always been the girlfriend, who is rather protective – it could also be the fact that he asked me out before her : / awkward again.
When he decided to meet up with me just us two, I thought hey up…. she’s let him out :I Even my parents thought exactly the same (both parents want us to be together lol). So I went along and met him.
We had the best night, 30 minutes of driving around and playing yellow car, taking the piss out of each other, laughing, no conversation breaks.
Then I asked how his girlfriend was, his reply “single”.
Oh….. I seriously didnt know what to do, look sad, concerned, smile or just I didnt know how to express, so I did a mixture of 3. LOL how bad!!
But in a weird way, I am happy he is now single as I have my best friend back, my best boy. We’re very alike in that we finish each others sentences, we think the same and laugh at the same jokes. He’s like the sportier version of me.
Unfortunately looking at that quote above, that is our relationship.
I fell for him when I was 16-18, I put my thoughts away under lock and key…… when I was 20, he came around my house at 7:30am and asked whether he would go out with me…. I was seeing someone else…. then he got with her.
Opportunities suck. Timings suck.
We did ask each other the other night, if we were to do something different over the past 10 years, what would we do differently, we both looked at each other and said ” grow some balls, go for it and take a chance ” and we both exchanged a glance, with no words.
Boys and girls can be friends, there’s always gonna be that attraction – that either you hide or you show.