All I want.

  • Is to lose weight.
  • Gain hair on my head.
  • Lose hair elsewhere.

I fucking hate pcos. I’m so fed up. But I dont wanna cry, but I do wanna cry.

Hate it. So fucking degrading.

It’s got worse in the past year, rapidly.

A letter that empowers me and makes me cry…

Here's to strong women

Hey all,

When I first moved into my flat back in March, I had so many emotions and I still do. I am still finding it hard to process, still trying to juggle financially (hopefully I am getting better) and I am trying to make it all okay for me.

At the start of the whole moving in and then into lockdown, I received a lovely letter from my auntie. I had hid it away until last week, as it caused me to cry a lot and I brought it out again this weekend as she came to visit. She was there when me and my mum were picking out curtains, choosing the rugs, the pillows etc so she has been on this journey with me. Continue reading “A letter that empowers me and makes me cry…”

5 places I want to visit

Copy of What I have learnt about myself during lockdown (1)

Hi all,

Hope everyone is well and safe. This blog post is about the 5 places that I want to visit. Fo years, I wanted to visit Glasgow – it’s where my Nan and Grampa were from and so many generations before that. I went last year and I loved it so much, I honestly did not want to leave, it felt like home. It’s odd to think that I was supposed to be going to Glasgow at the end of the month again and now I will wait until next year to visit it. Glasgow.

I am not really a “traveller” as such as I enjoy a lot of home comforts, but I thought I’d list out the areas I would love to go one day (in no order):

Australia

sydney opera house australia
Photo by Simon Clayton on Pexels.com

I feel like Australia seems to be a mystical land, full of relaxation, hope and just happiness. Quite a few of my friends have visited and have moved out over there. I feel that to me it seems mad how far away it is, how different but also so similar our cultures are. I am not a huge fan of all of the bugs and deadly animals that they have over there, but the amount of photos I have seen of the country, it just seems stunning.

Sweden

city view photography
Photo by David Skyrius on Pexels.com

Another country where I feel that there is a relaxed atmosphere about it is Sweden. It seems that there are so many positives in living in Sweden, including the culture of the country also seemingly laid back and chilled. It may not be the case, but that’s my perception of it. I have also heard that they have amazing winters and summers, so it really doesn’t matter when you go.

New York

high angle view of cityscape against cloudy sky
Photo by Quintin Gellar on Pexels.com

This one is such a cliche I know! But the idea of New York just amazes me, like is it really like a movie set all the time? Are buildings so on top of each other? Does smoke really come up from the ground? Why does everyone find New York amazing? I would love to go there just the once maybe up to 5 days to experience the madness, but also to visit Central Park and see hopefully the tranquillity of it.

Hawaii

sea
Photo by Troy Squillaci on Pexels.com

If you were to ask little Cat as to where she wanted her honeymoon to be, or which destination she would want to go on holiday, it will always be Hawaii. I have no idea why, but just the thought of it makes me smile so much. The beautiful beaches, the gorgeous landscapes and it just seems so super friendly.

Iceland

blue and green sky and mountain
Photo by Benjamin Suter on Pexels.com

As much as the idea of the above countries sounds lush, I am not that much of a sun lover. So the idea of Iceland is just right up my street. One of the main reasons I would love to go to Iceland is of course the Northern Lights. My favourite thing ever are the stars and to be able to see the Northern Lights would be just magical in my eyes.  The country also has the most amazing landscapes from national parks, falls to lagoons just beautiful!


So where would your top 5 destinations be? What draws you to them?

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Who inspires me

What I have learnt about myself during lockdown (5)

I think the people that inspire me are those that of course that are in my family but those that are in my circle of friends.

But to me people who are inspiring are those that have courage, those that have the strength and know themselves.

Those that flee negativity, those that keep positive no matter what, and those that bring happiness to others.

I feel that over this lovely lockdown we have really all seen so many inspirational people in the world. To me, my friends who work for the NHS and are carers will always be angels in my eyes, they deserve all the best that they can get.

Who inspires you?

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My pet peeves

my pet peeves

As I have said many many times before, I am all for positivity. I like to be positive and try to find something ever day, give someone else a positive comment and just generally I do not want to be in the dumps, as I easily could be. But we all have our pet peeves, and I thought I would let you know:

Negative people

3801dc4b163cd33fdaf977d8a42469deI know negative people and I see people on a daily basis. At one point I was surrounded by so much negativity due to changes of the environment, I was being more and more positive which in a backlash, made me feel like I was being fake. Of course I am open up to seeing different sides of the argument, thats the whole reason in having views and opinions, but its when someone’s views are ALWAYS negative and they don’t see anything else, that’s when it brings those around you down. I just don’t understand it, and when eyes are rolled when someone is being positive, I then in turn be more out there and just like to piss them off.

Controlling partners

fed318323d69e6bc670c0a2aadcf9d9fI for one have seen my fair share of over controlling partners, and they are not even my partners…. theyre my friends partners. Whether they are my best two boy mates and their over controlling girlfriends, or my girl friend’s partners im rather bored of being pushed out. I do not understand as to why when people get in relationships, their friends are just pushed to the side. When I am in a relationship, I will hands down share my time. I absolutely find it so frustrating, and I can see another relationship happening again. Grr!!

My latest one is that one of my close boy friends has been with this girl, she doesnt like me and there was a bit of an argument, she made me feel like shit for being his friend. It got to the point that he ignored messages and texts from me, until she randomly messaged me and had a go at me…. the reason I found out, was absolute bullshit and chinese whispers had happened. So I thought right girl power, lets just try again… the next day he was allowed to text me again lol… and er, we met up for the evening and it was brilliant. That happened end of February, have I heard from him since. No.

Awkward silences

a-social-anxiety-awkward-silence-moment

I think this is the most obvious one in which my family would say is my pet peeve. I cant sit in a room with someone, without doing something whether that be on my phone, read a book etc. If the tv is off, I will turn it on or I will play music on my phone. I  just cant stand the silence, I need to have something. Especially if there’s a chat going on and then it goes all silent… nope cant do it!

Politeness  that  is  ignoredEvery-time-I-hold-the-door-open-for-someone-just-to-be-nice

I am a polite person and I will keep the door open for someone coming my way, of course if it’s too far I won’t make it awkward haha! But when I open the door for someone and they do not say thank you, I will without a doubt speak louder and go YOU’RE WELCOME!!!! and I will literally look like the cartoon above. It takes what less than 2 seconds to say you’re welcome. I dont even care what age the person is whether they’re a teenager or 70+.

Ignorant people

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I dont know whether its because I watch various different programmes, listen to other people’s view points etc, but ignorant people just annoy me. As I have said previously one of my ultimate favourite tv show’s is Ru Paul’s Drag Race and I dont know whether its because I watch this show, its opened up my eyes to more. To the point, its a show about men dressing in drag who are openly (sometimes not) gay, flamboyant, argumentative and caring. But when people are not wanting to watch shows like this because its different, then bye bye – keep in your cage and your bubble. The world is moving on, look at Ireland!

So there you have it, my top 5 pet peeves. I am sure there are more but hey!

Oh there is, people who want their own way and slow walkers!!

Ok bye now.

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