Speak up when you don’t have the courage

Hi all, hope you’re well.

I just thought I’d blog about something that has literally just happened to me.

Now I just wanna put it out there now, I bloody love the NHS and what it stands for, what they do and how much this country loves it. But sometimes, I’m in disbelief.

I have been suffering with a bite on my leg recently so I went to see the doctors. I don’t like particularly going to the doctors unless it’s an issue I can no longer deal with myself.

I went in and saw a locum doctor, and I’ve never seen this doctor before. When I was going into the room, she was pretty straight faced, kept looking at me up and down and just didn’t really have the rapport the doctors normally do with their patients.

So I sat down and showed her my leg and she was like I don’t know what it is but antibiotics I’ll order them. That was pretty much it. But I had to ask what happens if it bursts, should I cover it, could it get worse? I even showed her a photo I took last night and it was like she didn’t give a damn.

I thought fine, she must be busy I’ll go.

For months now, actually well over 1 year now I have held back in asking when at the doctors about my pcos. Much like cervical screening, I wanted to know if the nhs asks patients how their pcos is doing, whether they feel it is getting worse etc. Pcos can affect your fertility and it’s scary!

I know for a fact that it has got worse, and I think the inner me is super scared that i will never be able to have kids. This was a moment for me, I’ve had this question in my head for all this time, putting it off as you literally can only deal with 1 query at a time (fucking ridiculous).

Anyway I asked, and it was literally like I asked her if I could shit in her mouth. She talked to me like I was a silly little girl, asked why I wanted to know and nothing would come of it if we did ask.

How fucking rude.

And guess what I plucked up my thoughts and said “I’m sorry, but you’ve come across as very rude to me. I am asking a question that is simple and took me some time to ask” and her response “I didn’t think I was ride, why do people keep saying this?”.

As im the type of person to get frustrated, I bloody cry. And I cried!! So embarrassing.

But what, if I was someone who needed mental health help, would she have shot me down do easily?? I was flabbergasted when I left, we shook hands and I was out.

Doctors are amazing people, but honestly just a simple bit of empathy goes such a long way

I’m not just a statistic, I’m a human!!

Shopping time!!! – MY Reviews

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As I was able to leave the house for the first time in ages in 3 weeks I thought of one thing and 1 thing only – Shopping!! Now I am not your usual girl who loves shopping for clothes etc, no mine is normally nitty bitty bits and sometimes I do go away and think why the hell have I bought what I have bought. I therefore thought I would show you:

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lips2I first saw this lipgloss // lip lacquer from a photograph on Instagram, if anyone ever follows the gorgeous Ben and Harley on Vine and the amazingly gorgeous mum Abbi then you will know of the photo. If you have no idea who I am on about please for the love of the cutest kid in the world check out these vines >>>>>>>> Ben & Harley <<<<<<<<<, and the gorgeous >>>>>>>>> Abbabubble <<<<<<<<< I promise you you won’t be disappointed. Anyway, I commented on her photo and she told me it was this product and it is a gorgeous crimson shade. I thought I would show you how it looks:

lipsAs you can see the shade is absolutely beautiful, until you open your mouth – I did not do that on purpose but look how much went onto my teeth!!!! The lip lacquer itself is really nice, smooth, shiny and not sticky at all. It has a lovely sheen/shine to it but unfortunately this would be a case of forever checking my teeth, or not smiling and that’s not me at all!!

skinI saw this freebie on another blog and I thought I would give it a go, I absolutely forgot I asked for it until I got in the post yesterday. It is the new Superstay Better Skin Maybelline in the shade of Nude. I have not found a foundation which is so close to my skin colour and look how close it is!!! SO I shall definitely be looking into buying a bigger product of this version, it was really easy to apply and it hardly shows up on my skin which is great.

mascara1I thought I would go old school, I used to wear this mascara all the time and it is a definite fall back for mascara for me. I have realised when applying today that this is one of my top 5 but definitely not my favourite. I have got a bit of spider eye going on and I don’t want to look like a 15 year old chav now.

fragranceI love diffusers, as my Dad smokes the rest of the house stinks and I cannot stand the smell on my clothes, the rooms everything. I currently in my bedroom have 4 diffusers, yes 4. This was on offer in Morrisons, I believe £4.99 or £5.99 and I thought I would give it a go. It’s beautiful, the little beads inside rattle which is different from other diffusers I already have – as they’re normally quite soft. Let’s see how long this one lasts!

20140418_174141My next pit stop was Poundland, I believe that this brand of Conditioner is the best. I do normally go for the gold version but I thought my hair needs a bit of lift at the moment and with of course them being £1 you cannot go wrong and considering most of the time they are £2+ in supermarkets you have to get them when you see them!!

20140418_173917With someone like me who has PCOS I am nearly every other day unfortunately having to take away excess hair from my face, I cannot stand it and my confidence is awful with it. For months I was purchasing the product on the right hand side from Superdrug which was £5, it comes with a tiny tube of the hair remover and moisturiser in which I never used and a scraper to take away excess. I was walking around Poundland and saw the tubes on the left hand side……….. it’s better, it lasts longer and look how much more there is compared to the Veet!!! It’s for sensitive skin and I have not had any issues with it. So I am just showing you in comparison, I have bought 5 tubes for the price of 1 of those tiny tubes from Veet. It’s absolutely ridiculous what you can find in Poundland.

20140418_174109Talking of Superdrug, as the Spring time and hotter weather is coming – we start to not wear socks or sometimes we do and of course everyone gets sweaty feet and this stuff is ideal. It’s amazing, cheap and lovely scent as well. I highly recommend.

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Everyone loves a fresh breathe – it’s on offer at Morrisons. I got cherry and mint flavour 🙂

feetFinally like I said earlier feet are coming out due to the weather and my poor feet are definitely affected by the cold weather so this will definitely be in use!!

Hope everyone is okay:

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What’s in my bag?..

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So here is my bag, my beautiful bag in which I got from a local market!! YES a local market and I love it. It has big straps which is great for my damaged shoulder as I can’t now carry around girly bags which really upsets me as I am a bag lady, not a shoe lady a bag lady. To be honest, if I could walk around in bare feet all day I would. Let’s see what is inside it shall we:

Continue reading “What’s in my bag?..”

Trying to eat healthy.

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Eurgh I am definitely the heaviest I have ever been and with Greece holiday coming up in July this stomach needs to go!! QUICK!! I am finding it very hard so tips and tricks would be amazing, I cant do anything strenuous as my neck and nerves are messed up – which means that I wouldnt be able to move my left side (wonderful I know!!)

So I am trying to do more walking, getting into walking faster haha – lots more water, I am trying more smoothies in which my favourites definitely have to be:

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God these are amazing, I have only tried the green one and the berry one so far as they are not as big in the UK at the moment and I have the mango one in the fridge in which I cannot wait to try. I am also trying not to eat after 9pm and inbetween meals which is becoming hard especially as I am a wonderful comfort eater.

I will get the home exercise DVDs out soon and last time I really enjoyed doing them, so I am hoping that I will have the same enthusiasm.

I am definitely not looking to be like a size 10 as I don’t think I have ever been a size 10 lol but I would like to be a size 14 again I felt amazing that size, currently I am size 18-20. More an 18 but I like to wear baggy clothing.

Eurgh, damn you media – but also damn you mind for eating.

Any tips would be seriously appreciated.

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Love to love yourself….

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We all have those bad bits on our body which we hate, which we want to change and what we would rather not look at. So I thought I would just get it off my chest:

  • My Stomach
  • My Legs
  • My Neck
  • My Hair (trichotillomania sufferer)
  • My PCOS
  • My IBS
  • My TOS (thoracic outlet syndrome) along with a further trapped nerve and my scars on my neck
  • My anxiety.

BUT on the other hand, I should also love parts of me as I have to live with me all my life and it is up to me to change some of those things so – I like:

  • My Hair Colour
  • My Eyes
  • My smile
  • My patience
  • I am easy to get to know
  • I am relaxed
  • My height
  • My boobs haha!
  • My characteristics on my face
  • My confidence when I do not care.

Although we all hate ourselves some days and just want to hide away, someone else may love our bad bits. So learn to love each part of you.

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